Module 7: The finale!

My age greatly affects my social confidence. When I am with young children I can be very confident because I know they do not judge the way adults do. When I am at work, I am very confident with the customers, and they trust my opinion. Outside of work, I find that people older than me really do not respect me a whole lot due to my age.

My ethnicity usually provides me with confidence, but that is mainly due to living in predominantly Caucasian communities. When taken out of my ‘safe zone’ I am very aware of my white skin. When I went to New Orleans by myself I was very self conscious, and I felt that everyone was staring at me. From the time I arrived in the airport to when my brother came the next day to meet me, I did not see a single Caucasian person. This really made me nervous even though I know it should not make any difference.

I am confident in speaking to people, and confident in my intelligence. I think if my parents had not been well educated and taught me so much of their knowledge I would not be nearly so comfortable in my own skin. I definitely have an edge over those people that did not benefit from the privileges of their family. My parents were never wealthy, but rarely were they poor. We have always been somewhere in the middle. I do not have quite the confidence that comes with having money pouring through my veins, but I know that my family has always loved me and have tried their best to provide everything they could for me. This really adds a lot to confidence and self assurance.

There are so many factors that go into confidence, and each and every one of them play a substantial role, whether conscious or not. If anything was different in my life, it would change the whole dynamic. In this area of the country I am lucky to be Caucasian, young, and middle class. I am educated and hard working. Whether I realize it or not, my confidence fluctuates with my life.

Module 4

Inner Dialogue:

Me: I am so scared to go up and talk to him.
Critic: You should be scared, what if he thinks you suck at your job.
Yoda: What is the worst he could do? Say no?

Me: I really need a raise to make my car payments
Critic: Maybe you should sell your car if you cant afford it. You arent going to get a raise.
Yoda: You deserve a raise because you have worked hard. You deserve that nice car.

Me: What if he says no?
Critic: What do you mean if, of course he will say no
Yoda: He will take everything into consideration and do what is fair

Me: I may not deserve a raise
Critic: You dont work hard enough for a raise
Yoda: If he didnt think you worked hard enough he would have told you about it before.

Me: If he asks me how much more I would want what do i say?
Critic: Dont ask for too much or he wont give you anything
Yoda: You tell him a fair number. He will tell you how much he is willing to give you.

Me: I hope he will say yes
Critic: He wont. You suck.
Yoda: He will say yes because you have worked hard for him for 2 years without asking for a raise.




The Five things that I would like to try but I am too insecure to are:

Para-Sailing
Take dancing lessons
Karaoke
Scuba Dive
Anything involving a bathing suit in public!!!

Module 2

When reading about the previous assignment, to set up a blog, I felt very confident in my abilities. I know a substantial amount about computers, and even though I have never used this particular website before, I knew that I would not have any trouble in setting it up. I have used many different online and computer based programs and did not hesitate to get it up and running right away. I already have a personal page on myspace, and use it infrequently to communicate with friends and loved ones and to share interesting or amusing things in my life or simply things I have found in my adventures of the internet. I do not update my page as often as most people do, although I do enjoy searching for new layouts and ways to make my page as different and creative as possible. I like to stand out a little when I am behind the protective barriers of my computer. It is much easier to show personality and be yourself when other people can not see you in person. In person I can be very shy and quiet when in personal situations. I am unsure of myself and people tend to read my shyness the wrong way. They assume that since I am not speaking with everyone that I am “stuck-up”. This could not be further from the truth.

In the work place, I am very confident in my abilities. I easily chat with people of all ages and backgrounds and try to find some common ground between us. I work in a customer service related field, I have to keep everyone happy. I am much more outgoing at work than I am in my “real life” although since I have been at this job I have noticed that my social confidence has definitely grown. I have plenty of confidence in things related to schoolwork, or intellectualness.

I think my confidence in this project reflects my confidence in my own intellectual abilities to learn and apply my previous knowledge to new and different situations. When given projects in the workplace I am able to jump right in and get to work with little or no further explanation or direction. I think this is an important quality of confidence, to be able to get the job done right away without hesitation and to keep everyone around you happy at the same time.

I approach most other tasks in this same confident way. Many times I will procrastinate until the last minute because I know without a doubt that I will be able to get the job done without any problems. Other times I get things done immediately so that I can relax. I’m not sure if the procrastination is actually related to the confidence, but I don’t think I would be comfortable procrastinating if I knew that I was unable to complete a task successfully.
I am glad that in this class we are able to try new and different things outside of the typical school settings.

Module 1

Confidence is the self assurance and belief in oneself that shines through to the outside world. “I would define confidence, generally, as the ability to be yourself in all situations. There is no discomfort or insecurity.” Many people are self-conscious about their weight, and those people seem to draw attention to it by being so obsessed over it. Most people would not even notice something like that if the person has a lot of confidence in themselves. It becomes a moot point.
This confidence draws others in as a beacon does. People are drawn to confident people. “People tend to be attracted to confident individuals, so, when someone is holding their head high and feeling good...those seem to be the times they receive the most attention from both sexes.”

People can recognize confident people from the way they look, the way they present themselves, their speech and body language. Some of the physical characteristics of being confident are head held high, smile, eye contact, head up, shoulders back. Other characteristics are cleanliness, and a clear, calm voice.
“Someone else would know that you are a confident person if you greet them with a firm handshake while making eye contact. They would look at your posture and notice that you stand up straight with your head held high. While conversing they would notice that you speak with a strong voice and are sure of what you believe in.”

People that I know are confident don’t need a bunch of frivolous stuff to fill in the voids. They are happy with the small things in life, such as friendships and family. They are successful at work, and often have a very good home life as well. They are not afraid to take risks or stand up for what they believe in.
“He is capable of walking up to people, meeting new people, isn't afraid of new experiences, and always does it with grace, a smile, dignity and charm that blows me away! If he is ever afraid or leery of the situation - you would never be able to tell on the outside.”

People can gain in confidence by having small successes that build confidence. A big part of confidence gain is self talk, and having a positive outlook on yourself and your life. If you have a negative view of yourself, others will too!
“I think confidence can be increased by really getting to know yourself and learning to love yourself for WHO YOU ARE. If you're sure of who you are -- really sure -- and you truly believe in yourself, you will be confident.”